Project 5

Project #5
E-flirt.com

Text or E-mail Some Sweet Nothings

“I turn on my computer. I wait patiently as it connects. I go online. My breath catches in my chest until I hear three little words, “You’ve got Mail.” I hear nothing, not a sound on the streets of New York. Just the beat of my own heart… I have mail, from you.”
Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kennedy in “You’ve Got Mail”
Your Project
Send a flirty text or e-mail to your husband.

Getting Creative

• Use an e-card service (hallmark.com or americangreetings.com) to send a cute and flirty note.
• Don’t know how to text? Ask any teenager in the general vicinity.
• Most phones have a camera feature where you can send a photo message. Be sure to keep it G rated so that he doesn’t get in trouble at work.

Project 4

Project #4
Heart vs. Stomach

A Treat Just for Him

 “You can tell a lot about a fellow’s character by his way of eating jellybeans.”
Ronald Reagan

Your Project:
Get a food treat for your husband that he’s not required to share with you or any other family member.

Getting Creative
Stumped for ideas? Here are some thoughts:

• Get his favorite pint of Ben & Jerry’s and hide it behind the frozen chicken. Even if you buy it on Tuesday, you’ll have it ready and waiting for his special night later in the week.
• Is there a certain cut of meat that your husband loves? How about having the butcher cut something just for him? Most supermarkets will even do the marinade for you – one less thing to think about.
• Is there a certain candy that your husband loves from his childhood? Check out www.candywarehouse.com. They have all the nostalgic candy you could want (Black Jack Gum, anyone?) while also carrying any modern favorite you could be looking for.
• My husband’s family loves something called “noodles and mashed potatoes” (we lovingly refer to it as “The Starch Fest”). I learned how to make this special dish just for him.
• My guy loves the smell of baking almost as much as he enjoys eating the treat. Have some brownies in the oven when he gets home from work or working out. (I know, it negates the workout, but isn’t chocolate always worth it?)
• Our friend Scott mentioned that he loves cranberry sauce, but eats it only at Thanksgiving. His wife intentionally made the holiday treat for him this past July.
• Are you a wife who is an expert at low-cal salads and other forms of chick-food? Check out The Ultimate Guide to Man Food at www.kathilipp.com for ideas

My Reason for Wanting to be a Better Wife...

When we first got married, I just thought what happens happens. A few years ago I began to reflect on things...my life, my marriage, me.

I'm not sure who said "The only person you can change, is you." I don't know when I first heard it, but I really began to think about that quote.

If you have a bad marriage, it's possible that you can make it a good marriage. If you have a good marriage, don't you think you can make it a better marriage? Can't things always get better (just like they can always get worse)?

I have read several books trying to help me be a better wife...

The Husband Project by Kathi Lipp
Created to be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl
The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie O'Martian
His Needs, Her Needs by Willard F. Harley Jr.
Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

I feel like I have come a long way from where I started as a wife, but I know that I still have a long way to go. What happens, doesn't just happen. It's what we make of it. I have gained something from each of the books that I have read and I try to continue to gain more knowledge of being a great wife. The book that I have gotten the most help from though is the Bible. There are countless verses on how to be the wife that God created me to be.

I think that if I become a better wife, in turn I will be a better Christian. If I become a better Christian, in turn I will be a better wife. I will continue to try to do both and with God's help, I will continue to grow as a wife and Christian.

One thing that really opened my eyes concerning my skills as a wife and really made me want to try harder to be the best wife I could possibly be was a quote from the second wife/marriage book I read (Created to be His Help Meet by Debi Pearl). I cannot remember the exact quote and I am having trouble finding it, but it goes something like this..."Would you want your son to marry someone like you?"

I need to be a good wife (1) because that's what God wants me to do and that's what he created me to do, (2) because my husband deserves it and (3) to model to my sons what kind of wife they should look for. If I am disrespectful to my husband, my sons will think that they should marry someone that is disrespectful to them, etc. (You can change the word disrespectful for any number of words.)

I have been praying since I knew I was pregnant with my first child, for each of them to have a good spouse. One that loves and respects them, one that they can truly become one with, one that will make the rest of their lives beautiful and not miserable.

Well, I hope you are doing the 5 Day Challenge (The Husband Project) with me. I also, subscribe to i-MOM's Espresso Minute (daily e-mail) and I found some things that go right along with Kathi's Husband Project. Check them out...

The 30 Day Marriage Challenge
The 15 Minute Marriage Boost (which has other links to help improve your marriage)

I encourage every wife (young and old, newly wedded or married for years) to try to be a better wife to your husband.  Wouldn't you like him to do the same for you?

"Do to others as you would have them do to you."  Luke 6:31 NIV


See that big smile above?  That's my reward.  I want to know that he smiles because of me (not frowns because of me), I want to know that he is happier for marrying me and that he doesn't regret the decision he made to spend the rest of his life with ME!

Project 3

Project #3
You da’ Man

Spreading Great Gossip About Your Guy

Your Project:
Say something nice about your husband to someone else. Make sure you tell him what you said, and to whom.

 Getting Creative
Who are the important people in your husband’s life? Your kids, his parents, his friends? Be intentional about who you chat with when you brag on him – it’s almost as important as actually doing it.
Having a hard time coming up with something? I still brag on my guy for things he did years ago. He loves when I tell the story of how brilliantly he proposed (there were waterfalls and stuffed portabella mushrooms involved…).

Here are some other areas to think about when crafting your brag:

• His parenting skills
• His patience level
• The way he treats your mom
• His culinary ability
• His job
• His loyalty to you

Project 2

Project #2Back in the Day

Do Something He Enjoyed Before You Got Married

“Lust is easy.  Love is hard.  Like is most important.”  ~ Carl Reiner

Your Project:

Initiate an activity that your husband used to love. Whether it’s his favorite hobby, sport, or pastime, it’s time for you to get involved – be his buddy today.

Getting Creative

• Many a man’s hobby has gone by the wayside due to matrimony. Is it possible that it’s time you learned to golf or fly fish? Don’t try to beat him, just join him.
• Possibly the only thing your husband would enjoy more than playing chess with you is teaching you how to play chess.  Ask for a lesson so he can teach you something that he is an expert at (or really loves). Just your willingness to learn will be a huge boost to your guy.
• Pick up a magazine about your guy’s now dormant hobby. Ask him questions about why he loves it so much. Learn a couple of technical terms so that you are better able to discuss it.
• Do a little research. Find out what the definitive website is on your husband’s favorite subject. Maybe there’s an event in town, a lecture to attend, or a game to watch.

Project 1

Project #1

30 Minutes is All it Takes

Create Some Free Time When He Gets Home

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

Your Project:

Focus on your husbands transitional 30 minutes today. Would he like to be left alone to rest and rejuvenate, or does he want some undivided attention from you? The point is to let your husband know you value what he does out in the world, and that he has a safe loving place to come home and get refreshed at the end of the day.
Getting Creative
There are plenty of reasons why it might not be easy for you to give your husband some transition time at the end of the day. You need to look at what can work for your relationship. Be creative, like the stories listed below. Brainstorm with your friends until you find a situation that will work for you and your guy.

• My friend, Joann, purposely scheduled her daughter’s dance classes twice a week at the same hour that her husband gets home from work. That way, her hubby comes home to an empty house. He gets some quiet, and she gets a more peaceful man.

• One husband has his workshop out in the garage. His wife encourages him to go and hang out there for a while before dinner. (Since starting this arrangement, her husband has started helping out with the after-dinner clean up. Nice side benefit.)

• Crockpots are The Husband Project’s best friend. Set your crockpot to be finished thirty minutes after your husband gets home from work. Let him know that you don’t need anything until dinner is ready. Don’t know a crockpot from a flower pot? Check out the recipes in The Ultimate Guide to Man Food at www.kathilipp.com

• Does your husband already have a great transition routine after getting home? Find some other little thing to bless that time. Maybe it’s making sure the TV is available, his favorite sweats are clean and ready to be changed into, or there’s a cold soda waiting for him in the fridge. It may be so small that he doesn’t even notice. That’s okay – you’ll know what you did.
• What if your husband works from home? Maybe the best way to help him relax is to ask what he would like the schedule to be. Does he want dinner before or after he gets some time to recharge? Ask him what would make his night better.

The Day My Cowboy Stopped the Cattle Rustlers - The Final Chapter

...they have a good chance at getting shot at just because they are there. (We have no choice but to protect our own way out here.) So, they probably weren’t able to call for help that way either.

What I have learned from this…(1) there is NO ‘Honor Among Thieves’ (if there was, the truck driver’s companions wouldn’t have abandoned him and left him to take the heat alone); (2) crime doesn’t pay (he got caught, he will have to pay an impound bill and a tow bill – which will be pretty hefty because of where we live); (3) news travels fast (this all happened on Friday night starting around 10:00 p.m – we got a call first thing Saturday morning wanting to know what happened – we hadn’t even had a chance to tell anyone, not even our family); (4) John Wayne always wins (wait, I already knew that).

The moral of the story…don’t take something that doesn’t belong to you.

You can read Part 1 here,
Part 2 here,
Part 3 here.

The previous story was a true story that happened to my family on Friday, February 4, 2011.

The Day My Cowboy Stopped the Cattle Rustlers - Part 3

...He described the truck to Frank and that was the same truck that was parked at our barn at 10:00 p.m. the same night trying to steal our cattle. He had been scouting out the farm and cattle.

The Truck Driver’s Story…

He had two companions earlier that evening with him, but he had taken them to another town and dropped them off. He got a call on his cell phone that a man he knew had bought and paid for some cattle and asked him to go and pick them up then gave him our address. He was here just trying to do his job.

There are several holes in his story: (1) when the officers checked his cell phone, there was no record of him receiving a call from the number he had given the officer or from man which he said had purchased the cattle and asked him to haul them – actually, there were no calls received at all during the time frame that he gave; (2) if you know anything about cattle at all – you don’t get them up at night – period; (3) if you are unfamiliar with the cattle and if they are unfamiliar with you or if you are unfamiliar with the layout of the farm – you don’t get cattle up by yourself (worst case scenario: you bring help; best case scenario: you get help from the cattle owner, who is familiar with the cattle, the cattle are familiar with him, he is familiar with the farm and how it operates – you know, which gates open in and which gates open out and which cross fences/gates lead to the barn and which ones lead to another field, etc.); (4) if you are hauling cattle, you back your trailer up to the end of the barn to make loading easier, not to the side of the barn - which may hide your truck from view, but makes it much harder to load cattle – or anything for that matter (if you are there honestly on a job, why would you need your truck hidden from view anyway? – just saying).

The truck driver’s companions probably had an interesting and difficult night, if they were with him (which I truly believe they were and they just ran off so as not to get caught). We live way out in the boonies, in the bottom of a hollow. Which, since they had been scouting out our farm probably thought that was to their advantage, but proved to be otherwise.

We live so far out that we do not get cell service within a five mile radius of our house. We do not have very many neighbors (there is only one house that is within sight and that is only during the winter months when the leaves are not on the trees and there is nothing to block sight). So, if the truck driver had two companions with him and they ran off, they cannot conveniently call for help. They would have to walk about five miles up hill either way to get cell service (it was dark and misting rain – that would also make things more difficult or at least more uncomfortable). Since they were from another county, it is possible that they were unfamiliar with the layout of the land (with the exception to the road).

If they were to go up to a stranger’s house that late at night (way out where we live) they have a good chance at getting shot at just because they are there. (We have no choice but to protect our own way out here.) So, they probably weren’t able to call for help that way either.

Part 1 here
Part 2 here
Part 4 here

The Day My Cowboy Stopped the Cattle Rustlers - Part 2

...Frank said, “I have a gun and if you take another step, I’ll shoot.” The man stopped (well at least he has a little sense about him).

Meanwhile, I was on the phone with the Sheriff’s Dept. and giving them as much information as I could and waiting until help arrived. I had three kids in bed and I felt helpless (thank goodness that they slept through the whole thing), I had no idea what was going on and there was nothing that I could do to help. Three patrol cars finally showed up after what seemed like forever (I guess just because I was scared for my husband). I had no idea what he was facing. I didn’t know how many there were, I didn’t know if they had weapons or not, it was pretty scary.

One of the officers recognized the truck and the driver and said that he had just pulled him over earlier that night for not having lights on his trailer. He said that there were three boys in the truck at that time. The officer began to question the driver of the truck about his former companions. According to him, he didn’t have his companions with him any longer.

The officers called in the tags of the truck – he wasn’t from these parts. The deputy found out that the driver was wanted (he had a record already - and theft was part of that record). He was arrested and taken away. One of the officers asked my husband if they could leave his truck and trailer where it was. Frank said that was fine, but he better be escorted by an officer when he came to pick it up because that man was never to set foot on our property again. They decided to haul off the truck and trailer.

The next day, one of our neighbors (we don’t have too many because of where we live) said that he saw a truck about 5:00 p.m. on Friday driving up and down the road. He described the truck to Frank and that was the same truck that was parked at our barn at 10:00 p.m. the same night trying to steal our cattle. He had been scouting out the farm and cattle.

To be continued...

You can read Part 1 here.
Part 3 here.
Part 4 here.

The Day My Cowboy Stopped the Cattle Rustlers - Part 1

It was Friday night about 10:00 p.m. and a little rainy, we were sitting on the couch watching a movie. I got up and went into the bedroom and Frank came running down the hallway. I could tell something wasn’t right. I asked him what was going on. He said, “I see flashlight lights at the barn.”

He put on his boots and hat (baseball cap), jumped on his trusty steed (actually we don’t have a horse, it was a Nissan Sentra) and rode to the barn. The barn is about ½ of a mile from the house and it is not easy to see, and with it being nighttime and a misting rain it didn’t help visibility. I opened our bedroom window and tried to watch as best I could. I saw his car lights stop at the barn, then I heard him yell. (Mind you, my husband is very patient, laid back and pretty tolerant, so when I heard him yell – I got VERY concerned.)

I ran down the hall and grabbed the phone and phone book and looked up the Sheriff’s number. Frank comes flying back home on his steed (Sentra) while I am on the phone with the Sheriff. I told him that I had the Sheriff’s Department on the phone and what should I tell them? Frank said, “Tell them to hurry before I start shooting. No one’s going to steal my cattle.” Frank grabs his gun and goes back to the barn as fast as he can. (You remember when I said that my husband was patient and tolerant? Well, he has no patience or tolerance for thieves.)

I found out later (when I was able to get all the details) that when Frank went to the barn the first time that the guys had their truck and cattle trailer backed up to the barn, they had all the gates open and were in the field trying to run the cattle into the barn lot, so they could load them on their trailer. Frank wrote down their license tag number and then he got on his tractor and blocked the would-be cattle thieves’ truck so they couldn’t leave. That’s when he came back home to get his gun.

When he went back to the barn, a man was standing beside his tractor (probably trying to figure out how to get it started so he could move it out of the way and leave) and began to walk toward my husband. Frank said, “I have a gun and if you take another step, I’ll shoot.”

To be continued...

Go to Part 2 here.
Part 3 here
Part 4 here

MHRF: I love this man...

When I was worried that I had only lost 1 pound in a week, he said "It's better than gaining a pound. See there, you're already 2 pounds to the good."

When I casually mentioned that I'd like to see him in a gotee (he doesn't usually have facial hair, other than the occasional 5 o'clock shadow - which is ruggedly handsome), he shaved everything that very day except for the gotee part. (He has such irresistible dimples, that I wouldn't want them covered up with facial hair, but a gotee wouldn't hide them would it?) Check out those dimples...


When I asked him to read a couple of chapters in a marriage help book (no we are not having trouble, but I enjoy reading and I want to keep things as good as they are) to explain to him how I felt (the book said it better than I could), he read them (he HATES to read) and then actually started doing some of the suggestions in the book.

I am so blessed. He's not perfect, but he's perfect for me.

I have a suggestion. The Pioneer Woman has taken how she met and fell in love with her husband and turned it into an online novel (you can read it here). I think that is so cool. My suggestion is for you to take 'Your Story' and write it down. No it doesn't have to be online, it doesn't even have to be a novel, but write it down somewhere.

You may think that it isn't interesting or that no one will care, but I promise you that someone will think it interesting (your children or grandchildren) and they will care. I would love to know how my grandparents or great-grandparents met. I know the story of my parents (I should write that down for my kids), but that's it. Write your story in a little journal, on line, in just a simple notebook, in a word document on the computer, but write it down...for posterity's sake. I think I will.

God Made a Husband

This should probably go on a MHRF (My Husband Rocks Fridays) post (but I always seem to forget on Friday).

I found this poem that I wrote to my husband ages ago, I could probably write more due to the fact that my love for him still continues to grow each day. I am not a poet, but I think you will get it.

God Made A Husband

God wanted someone strong enough to be the "Head of the House,"
yet gentle enough to hold his wife when she cried,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone hardworking enough to work his 40 hours,
then come home and spend his day off helping his wife do her chores,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone tender enough to hold his new baby,
yet had enough strength to be both protector and provider,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone kind enough to take time out of his busy schedule to cuddle with his wife,
but afterward willing to work twice as hard to catch-up on what he let slide,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone firm enough to discipline his family when necessary,
but He also wanted someone soft enough to hug and kiss his family when he was finished,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone patient enough to have a hard day at work,
and is still able to sit quietly by and listen to his wife unburden her load on him,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone willing to work hard at paying the bills (sometimes requiring him to work two jobs),
and still willing to spend time working around the house, playing with his family, and whatever else they wanted or needed him to do,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone who would "leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife," but loved his family enough to keep them a part of his new life,
so, God made a husband.

God wanted someone willing to do all that a wife required of him,
but still be willing to lay down his life for her and "love her as Christ so loved the Church,"
so, God made a husband.

I believe with all my heart that God made you just for me. Thank you Lord.

~Jena
2-26-97

Let's Make Our Husbands High Priority!

Katy Lin at The Great Adventure started '31 Days of Prayer for Our Husbands' yesterday (it's never too late, so jump in).

I also found a website that specifically addresses how to pray for your husband. You can check it out here.

We all need prayer. Our husbands are the 'Head of the household' (Ephesians 5: 22-30) which makes them the leader of our family. They are also our life partner. Don't we want the best for our life partner? Our husbands affect our lives in so many ways. I believe that prayer is a Christian's most powerful tool/weapon, but I feel (in general) that is not used near enough.

Join me in Katy Lin's effort to pray for our husbands.

A wonderful book that I read a year or so ago...Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie O'Martian. [I refer back to if often.]

My Husband Rocks

I've just joined My Husband Rocks ~ Fridays. I think it is the neatest thing (especially in a negative world) so I couldn't wait to tell you about it (I'll do a real post on Friday). Check it out on my sidebar.

One reason my husband rocks is that he kisses me first thing in the morning (when I look my worst and he doesn't even act like he noticed).

Why does your husband rock?

~Jena

Praying for Your Husband

I read a book not too long ago, Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie O'Martin (I've actually read several of her books, they are really good). It touched me very deeply. I believe that prayer is the most powerful tool that a Christian has, but is probably not used like it should be. It is one area that I feel that I can always improve on and I am always looking for ways to improve. I love to hear how other women pray for their husbands (it gives me a fresh, new perspective). Go to diary of a Stay At Home Mom and check out her 31 Days of Praying for My Husband. Let's all pray along with her for our husbands. Who cannot use prayer, wouldn't you like to know that your husband was/is praying for you?

~Jena

My Husband is Perfect!

O.k., not really. I know he's not perfect, but he is perfect for me. I listen to my friends talk about their husbands (not even bad really) and I think to myself "I wouldn't like that," or "That would really get on my nerves."

I know that Frank has his faults, but nothing that I can't live with. There are other men, I see how they treat their wives, how they act toward their wives, I hear things their wives say about them (yes, sometimes complaining and sometimes not - just 'matter-of-fact') and I have concluded that my husband is perfect for me.

I have known for a long time that God gave him to me. I know because I prayed (since I was a little girl) and my mother prayed that God would send me a good husband. I also know because he is strong where I am weak. We compliment each other.

So the next time your hubby gets on your last nerve, think it could be worse (he could have qualities that you couldn't stand) and then go give him a big hug and kiss and appreciate him for who he is.

~Jena

P.S. I was one of the winners of the 50% discount for the lunch tote give away that Erin at $5 Dinners had. I am so excited. I just ordered Retro Reborn and I can't wait to get it. As a plus right now they have $1 shipping on all orders at Spring Los Angeles.