The Funny, Broken, Love of Parenting
I
click open a Facebook message. A friend has sent me a word search and tells me
to let my eyes fall onto the image and take note of the first three words that
I see. These are the words that best describe me, she promises.
I
shrug, take a sip of coffee, and glance at it. “Funny,” “broken,” and “love”
are my words.
When
I close the message, I’m tempted for a moment to try again. What other words
are hidden in that tangle of letters? Maybe on my second try, my eyes will land
on a combination such as “smart,” “attractive,” and “successful.” (That would
be nice.)
I
don’t give it another try, though. The words I read the first time are just
right considering how I’ve been spending my days for the past several months, thinking
and writing about the family in which I am the wife and the mother and about my
family of origin, where my story began.
Funny,
broken, love - sounds like family.
MOMumental:
Adventures in the Messy Art of Raising a Family is about my own
missteps and small victories as a mother. Over the years, after beginning my
parenting journey – as so many of us do – staggering under the weight of the
expectations I had for myself, I’ve loosened up. I’ve come to learn that none
of us is perfect. We all fail, misunderstand our kids sometimes, and mess up in
countless ways. In MOMumental, I
share stories of some of my “epic fails” as a mom.
The
dire messages that flash on the computer or television screen that warn what a
mother absolutely must or must not do no longer hold me tightly in
their grasp. I now look at myself – and at other mothers – with less judgment,
knowing that we all work it out, there is no manual for motherhood, and that
the most important thing in raising kids is to be authentically connected with
them.
(And
a person can do that whether she serves microwaved macaroni and cheese to her
kids for lunch every day or gives them homemade bread and a sampling of organic
greens from her vegetable garden. Whether or not she homeschools them, uses
“the family bed,” or exposes them to Mozart by the time they are six days old.)
I
hope in sharing my own personal – and often quite cringe-worthy – story in MOMumental, other parents will show
themselves, and other parents, more grace as we raise our children.
To
me, those three words – funny, broken, and love – are great ones to reflect on
when I think about the gift of family. To be able to enjoy our kids, repair our
relationships with them when needed, and most of to love our children like
crazy covers a multitude of parental crimes and misdemeanors.
To hear an audio interview with Jennifer, click here.
